Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

Today, while walking downtown on my lunch break, some man called me a bag lady. I was carrying a purse.

Additionally, the grumpiest Target employee ever, without a hint of a smile, offered me free tennis shoes while he was ringing up my purchase. When I declined out of moral obligation, he told me he was joking. It was hard to tell if he was, though, since not a twinge of emotion crossed his face.

Also, Turkey ate a bite of my lasagna when I wasn’t looking.



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