As you may or may not know, I have a strange obsession with Dolly Parton. I LOVE HER!
So, it should come as no surprise when I tell you that I became giddy with excitement when, on Friday, my BFF Jenny texted to tell me that, not only was she at Dollywood, but that Dolly was there! You can imagine how much more excited I became when, shortly after, she texted me a video and tweeted pictures of her day.
I was at work at the time, still trying to adjust to my new life in the Boy’s Club, and I must have been smiling stupidly at my phone, because the guy in the cubicle next to me asked me what I was looking at.
Oh my goodness! I thought to myself. Small talk! He’s making small talk! I’m really starting to fit in here!
“Dolly,” I explained. “I love her!”
“Really? I could see that. You do resemble a young Dolly Parton,” he said.
I gasped dramatically. “Really?!”
“Sure,” he said. “The hair, the makeup, I see it.”
“Oh my gosh,” I exclaimed. “That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me!” Yep, I’ve really made it now, I think. “All I need now is a boob job!”
“Cause of her… You know.”
“Cause, when you think of Dolly, you think of… Right?”
We sat there awkwardly. Then he reached for his keys and stood up.
“Well, I’m going home now,” he said, finally breaking the silence.
What? Too soon to joke about boob jobs?
Back to square one.